“It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it.”

– Warren Buffet

Everything a man does is based on respect. Across the ages, we’ve dressed for respect, we’ve acted on respect, and we choose the way we talk and walk based on respect. It is our lifeblood and our greatest asset – one we must protect and take care of.

Once your reputation is doubted upon – men will banish you from their tribe and women will be repelled and choose to be protected elsewhere. It is our armor that is worthwhile to display and necessary to forge.

The Spartan Shieldwall

In the annals of history, one of the most iconic images of unity and strength is that of the Spartan warriors, renowned for their unwavering valor and indomitable spirit. What made the Spartans legendary, aside from their exceptional combat prowess, was their ability to form an impenetrable shieldwall known as the phalanx. This formation was the very embodiment of trust and respect among men.

Picture this: a battlefield bathed in the scorching Mediterranean sun, the air thick with tension and the ground trembling beneath the weight of impending doom in the form of endless legions in black clothing charging towards you. Spartan warriors, each a master of warfare in their own right, stood shoulder to shoulder, their shields interlocked. One shield formed the strength and stability of the other. In that moment, trust not being merely a concept; but the foundation upon which their survival rested.

The Spartan phalanx was a testament to the faith they had in one another. Each man knew that the survival of the entire formation depended on his unwavering commitment to protect the warrior beside him. They had endured hardships, undergone gruelling training, and forged bonds that transcended mere friendship. Their lives literally depended on their comrades’ undeniably competence and they had no doubt in the respect for their peers – this in turn, allowing them to confidently execute their own role.

This ancient display of unity illustrates a fundamental truth: respect from others is our lifeblood. Just as the Spartans’ survival hinged on their mutual trust, so does the course of our lives depend on the respect we deserve. It is the essence of our life and a basic human need in our fight for survival.

The Armor of Reputation

In the ancient world, warriors conveyed their respect and reputation not only through their deeds in battle but also through the regalia they adorned. Ancient warriors would find themselves in the most intricately decorated armor – that skilled smithies would toil on for months on end – each piece telling a story of their valor, achievement, and honor. They would carry onto the battlefield banners on their allegiance carried across generations for ages and tell stories of glory on return.

In battle, their beautiful shiny armor might be stained with blood and ripped apart – but at home, everyone made sure the shine returned and more decorations were included for they knew that even in battle – a warrior’s reputation was as crucial as their skill with a blade. As soon as an enemy would face one of these veteran warriors glad like a god – they would tremble and know.

Much like the decorated armor of those warriors of old, our own reputation is a reflection of our character, actions, and the respect we’ve earned from others. It’s the armor and banners we display, communicating our worth and values.

Like a golden-clad warrior-king, our decorations are not given freely, but must be earned. To earn respect and safeguard our reputation, we must align our actions with our values, just as those warriors of yore etched their principles into the metal that protected them. It is as much a communication of tribal connection as it is our own protection.

The Brotherhood of Trust

Now, let’s fast forward to the modern world, where our battlefields may not be fields of combat, but the challenges of life that test our mettle. In this realm, the principles of respect and reputation remain as crucial as ever.

Consider this: In your life, you may have observed a distinct difference between the men you’d trust with your life and those you wouldn’t. The bonds formed in the crucible of trust, be it through having each other’s backs, facing trials together, or enduring the rigors of intense training, create an unbreakable brotherhood.

This formation of the spartan shieldwall was not just about tactics; it was a display of unwavering commitment to protect one another. The trust they had in each other’s competence and the respect they held for their fellow warriors allowed them to execute their roles with unwavering precision. A warrior void of trust was not just disallowed from joining the battle; He was – without mercy – banished permanently from society.

In our own lives, we often find ourselves in situations that require trust, reliance, and the shared values of respect and reputation. The bonds we form with our brothers, built on this trust and mutual respect, are the strongest foundations for success. These relationships are not just about camaraderie; they are about collective strength to achieve more than you can alone.

Men know this. It is etched into our biological DNA to think in this way. This is why honor, trustworthiness, respect and reputation still hold as fundamental values in all masculine communities. We need other men that have our back to succeed, and it is why we need to ruthlessly banish those that not.

In the interconnected world we live in today, where challenges are diverse and complex, the brotherhood of trust remains a cornerstone of our collective journey. Just as the Spartans defended their city-state, we defend our values, integrity, and the respect we’ve earned, together as a united front.

The Blacksmith

For the male readers – let us construct our armour and delve into what constitutes our chainmail of reputation. We need two ingredients to forge our respect:

1. Trustworthiness
2. Competence

Trustworthiness being the essence of reliability and integrity. It’s the unshakable belief that when a man gives his word, he will honor it. It is a clear communication what your values are and that you stand by them. When we prove ourselves trustworthy, we offer others the assurance that we will act according to our principles, even in the face of adversity.

To build trustworthiness – communicate your values clearly and constantly through speech, action, clothing, your home, your car, and anything else. Say what you will do, why you will do it, and do it. Never, ever lie to people you want respect from and if you fail to do so – make it your absolute goal to repent to that person to an extreme.

Competence is the skill to be useful. Without competence, you cannot stand in battle and provide any protection to those around you. You will merely be a danger or a roadblock to achievement. A man needs to stand confidently on his own in order to have any kind of status that people want you as their peer or leader.

To build competence – and thus confidence – become useful. Learn skills, forge an athletic body and make it your life goal to protect others and make the world a better place. Deny yourself of emotional instability that might sabotage your progress. Become a better person.

Of these two, trustworthiness is unquestionably unnegotiable. In fact, a competent person that is untrustworthy can absolutely destroy all that you have built. They are dangerous to you in malicious ways. The more competence a person has – the more trustworthiness is required to allow him in.

An incompetent but trustworthy individual will at the very least communicate his incompetence – making it clear that you cannot count on him for something. A very trustworthy individual will actively seek mentorship to be able to contribute. Competence can grow, trustworthiness is rooted in core values and is unlikely to significantly change.

A person that is both incompetent and untrustworthy is simple useless. They hold little danger but should be kept at bay in case their competence rises.

The Knight in Shining Armour

Notice how respect is the lifeblood and core energy of a man. In the end – this is all he can provide – competence and trustworthiness. It is also all he wants to provide. He wants to be the knight in shining armour.

A respectful man does not seek superior dominance over a lady. They seek submission, yes, but what he seeks is not as a desire for dominance, but as a longing for respect and an acknowledgment of their worth, opinions, choices, and competence. He wants her to polish that armour and display his reputation to the world. He knows that respect is not taken, but must be given.

Which truly does align with women. They, in turn, desire not dominance but protection, and not authority but partnership. They seek men who are both trustworthy and competent, those who can provide not just physically but also emotionally and intellectually. A woman desires to respect her man, for in his strength, she finds her sanctuary.

He must earn his reputation – but if he does, the most beautiful gift you can give him is your respect. Your respect for his competence – that he can deliver on what is needed, and your respect for his trustworthiness – that he will deliver what is needed.

A respect that he will make the right choices, a trust in his willingness to execute and the competence to do so.

With respect as the cornerstone, a relationship between man and female can navigate the trials of life, facing them as a united front. A man’s trustworthiness and competence become his gifts to his partner, just as a woman’s respect and support become her gifts to him.

The Raw Metal

Yet just as no armor can be forged without raw metal, no reputation can be forged without character.

Just as respect from others forms the foundation of a man’s reputation, self-respect is the bedrock of his character. It is the inner core that forms the base of the shield. Without self-respect, all external respect loses its potency.

You must first wield this raw essence and become one with yourself. Forge your character by holding yourself to your own promises and becoming someone you yourself can be proud of. Be honest to yourself about your capabilities and intentions.

Respect is not merely a social nicety; it is the essence of our character, the expression of our worth and the armor of our reputation. It forms the foundation for our relationships, and the bedrock of our self-worth. It is the lifeblood that courses through our veins, nourishing our souls and defining our legacy.

As men, we must embrace its power, nurture its growth, and honor it in ourselves and others. Honor must be restored as the core value of our society – as it was so long ago. And as the ancient spartans say;

“Come back with your shield. Or on it.”